Secrets
by Hella-venger
Summary: When Bakugou's outed as a trans woman, suddenly the tables turn and she finds herself as the victim for once. How does she deal with this? And why the hell is that nerd Deku helping her? Trans Girl Bakugou. Pre-UA.


**TW's are Transphobia, Ableism, Transphobic/Ableist Slurs, Forced Coming Out and Abusive Parents. If any of these are a trigger for you, please put your comfort first before reading.**

* * *

There's having a silver spoon built into your mouth, and then there was Bakugou. If you said it to her, she would break every single one of your teeth and laugh the whole time. But the truth was, fate smiled down on her. It gave her a quirk that could make the top 10 rankings on power alone. Adoring cronies and sycophant teachers who would do anything for the _Next No.1!._ And it went to Bakugou's head quicker like a roller coaster. Bakugou stopped caring about being good and doing good. There were those who got that she was the best, and those who didn't. And the latter would be beaten till they became the former. That was her mantra.

At least, it was. Until the day she realized she was just that. A she.

Rage is a suppressant. It's a drug. Fling yourself into it and feel absolutely nothing bar it. Don't feel the jealousy you get when girls walk by, just feel rage at "Loose bitches" like them. Don't feel like calling your mother out when she points and laughs at the idea of a man wearing a dress. Just feel rage that she's so loud. Don't feel like crying when you have to look in the mirror. Just feel rage towards the kids at school who didn't care about being a pariah, as long as they get to be themselves.

Bakugou wished desperately for the world to see her as a woman. No, THE woman. The woman who would be No.1 Hero and break anything down in her way. But those things were mutually exclusive in Bakugou's mind. Bakugou didn't want that asterisk next to her name when the rankings popped up. Top TRANS hero. She wanted to be the best hero period.

Still, there's one thing stronger than rage. And that's a pain. Pain at being seen as a man when you knew damn well you weren't. Pain at being considered a freak just for being you, and not even having the bravery to say otherwise. Pain at hiding. That pain was too much some days.

Today in particular…..

* * *

_One Year Before UA Entrance Exams….._

The hustle and bustle of the school's cafeteria was unbearable to Bakugou. Gossiping dumbasses about some superhero gossip in the magazines. The repeated "Whooping" and "Wooing" of idiots laughing at unfunny jokes. And the loud, obnoxious breathing of those around him. The people who thought friend and crony meant the same thing.

"Hear the big news, Bakugou?" Tsuba, bucktooth and two pterodactyl wings sticking out of his back looked like a freak. But Bakugou found the wings up her intimidation factor. So, crony.

"That you're ugly? Everyone knows that." And Tsuba just squeaked out a goddamn laugh at Bakugou's taunt. By God was he a kiss ass.

"Good one, Bakugou!" Joined in by the other crony at the table, Marie, who's drillbit hair bobbed as she guffawed outwards.

"Nah, we're talking about Tiger." The pro? This was something new.

"Yeah, hear he's a tranny!"

Oh no. Bakugou had learned that word. Gaming forums. Internet browsing. Even just walking down the street, any woman who didn't look the picture of femininity would have it hollered at them. But Bakugou knew who that word was truly targeted against. People. People like her.

"Probably wants a big dick, the fuckin freak girl! How did they even let some looney like that become a hero?" Fists clenching at Tsuba's ignorant spewing, with the sparks being added by Marie's encouraging giggle.

"Shut it…" The words, barely a whisper above the chaos and destruction happening around Bakugou. They didn't even notice.

"Hey, Maire. Didn't you have a crush on her?" Tsuba received a hurled plastic bottle in response, which he clumsily blocked with a wing.

"Shut it…." Once more, a whisper. Once more, ignored.

"Ewwwwwwww, don't even, Tsuba. I don't like he-she's!"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Hurling to her feet, Bakugou grasped both of them by their collars, eyes full of fury.

"Bakugou, the hell's wrong with yo-" Tsuba's wing would have the scorch marked Bakugou just laid on it for the rest of his life. Not long enough for Bakugou.

It was, however, a symptom of a bigger problem Bakugou was currently going through. Her rage was now being mixed with the pain. Two opposing wolves. And this chaos within would lead to mistakes.

"Don't you ever talk about me like that again-" Too late. Bakugou realized too late what she had done, her awestruck hands releasing the two bigots. She had made a mistake. Bakugou had let her closest guarded secret fall away.

"Bakugou, why are you spazzing out? It's not like you're a…"

While Tsuba was cursing and pawing at his burned wing, Maire remained standing. And slowly, a sick smile grew on her face. Like a hungry hyena, looking for weakness in the wolf. And she had found one.

"HEAR THAT EVERYONE!" Marie didn't have all the facts and probably wasn't even sure of what she was about to say. But that didn't matter. The scene, the emotions all of it had come together in the perfect moment to dethrone Bakugou.

"BAKUGOU'S A TRANNY!"

Bakugou hadn't heard the last part. Miles gone she already was.

The bleachers above the gym were barren today. Mainly because Bakugou had stayed within till after the school closed. Her parents would be wondering where she was. If they hadn't already heard of what happened. Bakugou could picture the headlines now:

_School Prodigy Outed As Deviant._

Goodbye, No.1 Hero. Hello to the Asterisk.

Before wallowing in self-pity could continue, Bakugou heard the sound of someone clumsily opening the gym doors.

Hands raised from Bakugou in and Maire looking for a power-play against the weakened Bakugou? Her parents looking for her? Bakugou wasn't sure which she'd rather face. But it was neither.

It was a fluff of green hair and a slight shimmering of metal in the moonlight.

"What do ya' want, Deku?"

"Well, first of all, do you know what time it is, young lady? Your parents would probably be thinking you're off galavanting with some ne'er-do-well hoodlum!" Great, he's bringing out the snarky. His own shield from being a pariah. This was just what Bakugou need-

Wait. What did he just call her?

Running down the bleachers, barely being able to hold back the explosions from her feet as she did so, Bakugou marched up to Deku.

"How did you know?" This was HER secret. No one. Not a damn person in the world knew it.

"That you're a girl?" Deku's snark seemed to dissipate right now. Instead filled with a gentleness that Bakugou hadn't realized how much she craved. "Because you are one, Bakugou."

Bakugo wanted to let loose everything on Deku. Rage. Pain. Hurt. This was the quirkless wannabe who Bakugou had made her no.1 target. Left Deku and his friendship behind once he stopped being useful. This was bullshit! Why was Deku helping her? WHY?

"Why are you helping me?"

"Because it's what heroes do."

And Bakugou could only just realized how foolish she had been to call Deku a wannabe.

* * *

Returning to school was not a fun affair. Well, returning anywhere after you've been outed as a woman-a woman that's not approved by society-rarely is fun. But, Bakugou trudged along, head down and daring anyone within ten feet to make eye contact. It would be hard for them to keep once their eyes have been burned to a cinder. And Bakugou had nothing left to lose-

Oh, who was she kidding? She wasn't going to knock them out. She wasn't going to use her Quirk so flagrantly, so easily. All those safety nets that eagerly protected her from this weird little thing called "consequences"? Gone. Dust in the wind. Powerful Quirk or no, a trans girl still ranks low on the totem pole of school priorities. So, Bakugou couldn't lash out and brutalize those with the privilege of being "lucky" any longer. She was simply going to have to deal with life as something Bakugou had so gladly inflicted on others.

A victim.

Well, better get the shitshow started, Bakugou thought. Moving down the hall, a scowl as the only shield to the whispers and glares suffocating Bakugou from her fellows. Bakugou wished she had an ear closing Quirk. It'd be absolutely useless for any moment other than this. But that use would be all worth it.

_"I can't believe Bakugou's a transvestite!"_ Not even the right word.

_"Hear he tried to cut his dick off?"_ Damn sure didn't happen.

_"Like he'll get into UA after this!"_ That one, Bakugou believed, was sadly true. UA was the best of the best. And best is a word so often synonymous with privileged. And Bakugou had just lost all of hers. Hopefully one of the "lesser" schools would take her in. Hopefully.

But right now, she just wanted to get this cement block of books off her back and shove it into the locker.

A shame a messy haired, freckled kid was standing in front of it.

"Outta the way, Deku." A low mutter. Not a growl as Bakugou was ever so used to addressing Deku with. Last night, Bakugou had realized something. Quirk or no Quirk, Deku was a thousand times the hero anyone in this school could hope to be. Hell, he only had one hand and you just know he would give up the other to someone who needed it. Guilt was burning deep within Bakugou from how she had beaten and berated Deku for being "useless" all these years. And yet now, he was the only one actually trying to help Bakugou. Parents weren't much help there.

_"I don't wanna go to school."_

_"You're going! I won't have brats talking about my son being...being one of those!"_

Thanks, Mom(!) Great pep-talk.

"Why so hasty, Bakugou? Why don't we go for a walk? I hear the polluted pond outside is turning a beautiful fermented orange this time of year!" Snark. Deku's defense and shield. To being quirkless. To being disabled. To having Aspergers. To being different. Bakugou would have to learn her own defenses. Right now,however, she needed to get into her locker.

Grasping Deku by the shoulder, making sure not to lay a finger on his face, Bakugou gently shoved Deku to the side. By God, she was already getting soft. Seeing what was scrawled on her locker, being soft just wouldn't cut it.

**ALDERA'S NO.1 TRANNY!**

The explosions were slowly smoking from Bakugou's hands, rising to the points of the roof, nearly about to set off the smoke alarms. Luckily, they removed the batteries. Back when Bakugou was "privileged."

"WHO DID THIS?!" FUCK BEING UNDER THE RADAR. FUCK BEING AFRAID. FUCK BEING WEAK! Whoever did this was gonna pay.

And the low squeaking and guffawing laughers bursting respectively from a winged and drillbit pair of bigots showed the origin of this mockery.

"Come on, Bakubro! Take a joke. Better get used to it now cos your life's one." Marie, holding a hand in front of her mouth, had her drill hair whirring and twisting with each guffaw.

"Maybe the spastic can give you some tips!" Bakugou had said far worse and done more brutal things to Deku than calling him words like that. Hearing it now, all she felt was a righteous rage. It didn't matter that Deku just furrowed his brow at the slur. But Bakugou wanted to break both of their skulls for Deku and herself.

"Girl or boy, I can still beat you down like before." Raising her hands, Bakugou's smile returned as her quirk begun activating, sparking in anticipation. This was her. A warrior.

"What's going on here?!" The teacher, Alsuka, bald headed and with a pair of foggy old glasses, was shuffling over while coincidentally shuffling a stack of papers in his hands.

"Sir, Tsuba and Marie we-" Deku's voice was cut off. A sadly common thing.

"Don't listen to him! He's all messed up in the head. Bakugou went nuts on us." Oh they were about to see Bakugou go nuts on them. "He started asking us to call him' _Suki_! He's a weirdo!" This rant from Marie wasn't about proving the truth to Alaska. It was simply another play to dethrone Bakugou's now empty position.

Bakugou didn't reply. She simply marched forward and went to grab Marie by the throat to squeeze the lies out of her. A hand halted Bakugou's before it could reach further.

"Bakugou, report to my office! Midoriya, Tsuba and Marie. Go to your classes. We will not have chaos in the halls."

"Sir, Bakuogu didn't do anything-" A sharp thud in the arm from Tsuba's wing and Alsuka pulling Bakugou away was all the answer Deku needed. They weren't gonna take the side of a "messed in the head weirdo" and a "crossdresser".

They wanted heroes to graduate from this school. And according to them, heroes were "normal."

* * *

Alsuka did what was expected of his position: The bare minimum. The words of an educator who cared little for actually helping those underneath their care and more towards whatever got their paycheck in the mail to arrive quicker.

"Katsuki," That stupid, fucking name had haunted Bakugou for her entire life. It screamed "MAN!" and held nothing but pain for her. A pain she had endured because it was her cost for success. Now she had no success, so what was the point of keeping the name.

"We are aware of your behavior problems," They weren't problems before she came out-NO, correction: Before she was forced out of the closet in front of a whole cafeteria of gawking onlookers. No, back then it was just _youthful folly. _Amazing how this privilege slipped off like a glove so quickly. "But you cannot use your Quirk in open so flagrantly. It's not only a violation of school administration, but of laws. You seek UA, do you not?"

"Like they'll fuckiin' take me now.." A low mutter which Alsuka choose to ignore. He choose to ignore a lot of Bakugou's actions in the past. It was just the first time Bakugou was on the receiving end of it.

"Son," Oh, he never called her that. That was an aimed shot. A little glimpse into how this teacher truly thought of Bakugou's _deviancy. _"You have talent. And a brain on your shoulders. Just try to keep it straight and you'll be fine."

Bakugou wanted to yell and howl.

"_You let this happen! You let my life go to shit! You ruined me!"_

But Bakugou realized something simple and deep. That would make her a hypocrite. How many people had Bakugou tormented and got off with a slap on the wrist because she was "Exemplary"? How many times did she push Midoriya into the mud and expect him to just take it for being "different"? How many times had Bakugou used the system that was biting her in the ass right now for her own benefit?

Silently, Bakugou picked up her bag from the floor and lurched out the door.

_Too many times._

* * *

Lunch. The cafeteria. The place Bakugou had watched her life crumble beneath her feet just yesterday. The loud calling of slurs and hateful names that accompanied her when she left yesterday had been replaced now with the silence of judgement. The silence of superiority. They were better than Bakugou now, at least in this schoolyard world.

And like a _good bottom of the totem-pole_, Bakugou resigned herself to a corner with a chicken salad sandwich to keep her mind off the pain of losing everything.

Shame a certain fellow outcast decided to take the accompanying seat next to him.

"Now, what's a pretty girl like you doing all by herself?"

_Useless Deku. Never thought of calling him anything other than that. Never thought of him anything was just a one-handed, quirkless, messed-up-in-the-head hero wannabe who didn't know when to stay down._

At least, that's what Bakugou thought of Midoriya for so long. How wrong she had been. This former friend had not hesitated in holding out a hand to her last night. Didn't hesitate in trying to bring some light to the darkness that Bakugou's life had become. Why?

Why was this kid she tormented for so long willing to help her? Why wasn't he reaping the rewards of seeing her abuser brought so low?

"Whaddya want, Deku?" Grumbling into her sandwich, Bakugou chewed out the words. Keep Deku at arm's distance. That was the plan. She didn't need pity. She may have wanted it deep down, but she didn't need it.

"Well, besides a slice of that nice slice of that rye bread you got there?" God, his snark remained no matter what, huh? How did he stay so slick and witty with every beating and barb. Bakugou used to find it infuriating. Now she found it admirable. Here she was, wallowing in her own self-pity, and Deku could still keep a smile and joke. Just another way he was better than him without her even realizing it.

"Quit the joking or piss off!" A few pieces of bread spat out from Bakuogu's small outburst.

"Say it, don't spray- Actually, that joke's beneath me." The glare from Bakugou earned two defensive raised hands from Deku. "Alright. Alright. I'll quit my stick."

And now silence once more found this to be more engaging than the jokes. But the most painful thing would be to address the elephant in the room. Easier to simply eat in silence with Deku. It was cowardly to avoid it-

That's right. It was cowardly not too address it. And Bakugou had been a coward for too long.

"Why?"

"Comes right after Z-"

"Shut it." Through gritted teeth, Bakugou braced all the force she wanted to punch herself with to grasping the table. Bakugou needed to do this. No matter how painful it would be.

"Why are you helping me? And don't give me that hero crap."

Deku stared deeply into Bakugou's buttons. He always had trouble with eye contact. Bakugou…Once of her less proud moments was when she would target Deku's face during her torment. She was so well aware of how that was a trigger for his episodes and she didn't care. No, it was worse. She did care and that's why. Bakugou was glad Deku couldn't make eye contact. Because Bakugou wouldn't be able to match those eyes of righteousness.

"I…..We used to be friends. What you did, I'm not gonna say it's OK. Because it's not. And if you keep acting like that, I'll be perfectly happy eating by myself." Eyes softening, Deku made a slight smile. Bakugou found that her assumption of Deku truly being hero material last night only strengthened.

"But I've found that when people know what it's like to hurt. Really hurt. They stop hurting others. They become kind." Holding out his hand, the mit with stapled metal. Along it was engraved the words "_**HELP."**_

A memory flooded back into Bakugou's brain. Of one day tormenting Deku.

"_I WANT PEOPLE TO TAKE MY HAND AND KNOW THAT ANYONE CAN BE A HERO! THAT ANYONE CAN HELP!"_

Well, he was proving that now.

Bakugou took the iron hand, the coldness bringing her back to reality.

"You're weird, Deku."

"It's one of my most endearing qualities." Bakugou couldn't deny that.

As the years went on, Bakugou would look back on these days as some of the most harrowing of her life. But alongside it, Bakugou would see it as the day she truly got to learn of the greatest hero she had ever met.

And of course, the best friend Bakugou could ever hope to have.


End file.
